If your partner doesn’t want to go down to your bikini zone, don’t worry. In this article we will tell you how to make him do what you want… 

According to studies of sexologists, 90% of women and only 70% of men give oral pleasure to their partners. Cunilingus is still a thing that men don’t care much about. If your man doesn’t make you glad with his tongue there are some ways to encourage him.  

First, of course, you should talk about it with your partner. As always you you should start with confirmative phrase: “I like our sex, but it can be better if…”. Despite the fact that men don’t understand clues, no need to speak directly that you want oral pleasure from him. You should remember that sex subjects demand you to be delicate and if you go too far you can hurt his feelings, In any case if you tell him that you get aroused when he kisses you “there”  no man will refuse to give maximum pleasure to his sweetheart. 

If you already started a conversation about oral pleasure, you also should learn why he doesn’t want to give you this kind of fondling. Maybe he got some stereotypes or some false understanding of this thing. Usually reasons why a man doesn’t want to give oral pleasure to a woman are the next:

  • “I am a man for God’s sake!” And cunnilingus is the thing that can destroy a masculine image. We don’t know why. Still in such case you can tell him that a possibility to give to his woman what he wants makes him a real man.  
  • “It’s not hygienic”. Even if he never approached female genitals he can have all these stereotypes about bad smell from vagina. Actually female smell can be very different and it changes according to cycle. The only thing he must accept: smell of pussy is a smell of pussy. It doesn’t smell like roses but it doesn’t smell like fish also.  
  • “I don’t know how to do it” Maybe he is afraid to fail. Possibly he worries that you won’t like it and maybe he has a bad experience of oral pleasure when his partner disliked his job. Try to explain to him that you love him and want to enjoy him in general. In the end if he is not good at oral pleasure, you can present cunnilingus as a part of prelude.  

To ask a man about oral fondling you don’t have to speak directly. There are several ways that help your partner to understand what you want from him: 

Non-verbal signs

No need to exclude a variant that your partner doesn’t pay attention at your most intimate zone because he doesn’t know what definite actions he must take. Also he can be not sure if you like oral sex at all. Non-verbal signs, movements and gestures can become a good clue for him. For example when he kisses your belly bend yourself so your pubis is nearer to his face. You can put your fingers in his hair and direct his face softly to your crotch. Moving your hips is also a good message for him that he is on a right way. 


If you can’t speak about your wishes directly, you can choose a more creative way to tell him what you want. We all like games, because they return us into childish state of easiness and carelessness. Suggest your partner some classical game but with an erotic subtext. For example you both can play cards for wishes, but you must be sure that this strategy works. Also truth or dare can be helpful: you can write your wished on pieces of paper and put them in a hat. He must do the same with his wishes.  


Choose poses where your part body that needs more fondling is close to his face. For example during a blowjob you turn your back to your partner making a position “69”, he is likely to start fondling you too. Different variants of poses can help your partner feel comfort as many poses for oral sex are not very convenient. Put a pillow under his chest and your hips so that his neck wouldn’t stiff during oral sex. 


All men need approval of their actions during sex. And you praise can expressed not only by words and moans, but also some clarifying phrases, for example: “Yes, it’s good here”. You can moan a little bit louder every time when your partner fondles you with his tongue and lips near your intimate zone it lets him understand that you like being touched there. The more encouragement he gets the more often he repeats his actions. 

Oral sex is a great way to diversify fondling, give a sensible pleasure to each other and become closer. And if your partner refuses what you dream of, maybe you’d better think that an egoistic man is not the best sexual partner.